Thursday, August 11, 2005

Poker Chip Tricks

Nick the Greek: Dunno. Seems expensive.
Tom: Seems? Well, this seems to be a complete waste of my time. That, my friend, is 900 nicker in any store you're lucky enough to find one in. And you're haggling over 200 pound? What school of finance did you come from Nick? "It's a deal, it's a steal, it's the Sale of the fucking Century!" In fact, fuck it Nick, I think I'll keep it!
Nick the Greek: Alright alright, keep your Alans on!
[Peels off notes from his wad]
Nick the Greek: Here's a ton.
Tom, Eddie: Jesus Christ!
Eddie: You could choke a dozen donkeys on that! And you're haggling over one hundred pound? What're you doing when you're not buying stereos Nick? Finance revolutions?
Nick the Greek: 100 pound is still 100 pound.
Tom: Not when the price is 200 pound it ain't! And certainly not when you've got Liberia's deficit in your skyrocket. Tighter than a duck's butt you are. Now, lemme feel the fibre of your fabric.
”Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels”

I know I have quoted that movie before, but it is such a quality flick that it seems to have too many quotes in it to ignore. I always get that last line wrong too, so this will help me avoid that little mix-up.

Tasteless joke of the day – heard this one on the TV last night. You have been warned.

Apparently, as part of a new reality show, Brittany Spears plans on filming the birth of her child. Won’t it be interesting if she has a caesarean? It will be just like one of her concerts – the lips will be moving but nothing comes out.

You were warned.

Last night I finally finished off the 600 raked hands at Poker rewards to claim the PSO bonus. Shame I didn’t read the forums first, I could have changed that 6000 PSO points into 9000 points, but oh well. Even though the voucher hasn’t gone through yet, I have already spent the money. I will be receiving Chappelle’s Show season 1, “The Professor, the banker….etc” which I hear nothing but great things about, and “Death of WCW” the second book by R.D. Reynolds of Wrestlecrap fame – whose link I have over to the side below the blogroll. Again, I’m happy with the choices I have made.

But I am left with a dilemma. My hatred for Poker Rewards and their support is well warranted, and I am increasingly frustrated with the faults of their software. Unfortunately, in those 600 raked hands (including some MTT and SNG money) I am up 69% on my original deposit. What also annoys me is that if I play another 1400 hands, I clear the deposit bonus for another $200. Is it worth it? Can I stick it out? I have just started on the $1/$2 tables where nearly every hand is raked so they all count, and I have been doing ok at them in a very small sample – 3 positive sessions out of 3, but none of them a monster session. My other option is to go bonus chasing else where, which is always nice too.

When you live at micro limits, you can’t but help being a bonus whore. I guess that is something that keeps the little fishes alive at this level, and who am I to complain?

On to the games last night, I am finding the tables tight at the moment, and this has worked in my favour. A pre-flop raise has never been re-raised since I started at $1/$2, and more often than not it gets me heads up. I seem to have developed an aggressive table image very quickly, because I get called down often. Which is fine I guess – they want to see if I actually have anything. But after I have been called all the way to the river and then collected the pot with top pair, no kicker 4 times, I get to see a lot of flops on a free-roll. Then the nasty flops start hitting me square in the face, and 25o makes straights on the turn. Then that really pisses people off, which I like. It seems in these short sessions, people are more than willing to call me down with second pair or Ace high – I am making modest progress money wise without getting any monster hands.

An interesting thought came in the audio commentary with Eric Lindgren and Daniel Negreanu. They were talking about making big lay downs, which obviously can save you a packet. What they were concerned about (and this obviously only concerns live play) was showing when you made a big lay down. The heralds two problems: Either you made the correct decision, but now the other players know you are willing to lay down big hands and will try to bluff. Or number two, you’ve made the wrong decision and laid down your hand to an inferior one, giving the other player a major confidence boost and letting him know that he definably can bluff you.

Now I’m not even going to pretend that I can talk poker theory with these two guys, but I have to agree with what they are saying – and I am very guilty of the offence. I think it is an ego thing, trying to show that you made a big lay down because you know they have a monster hand, look how smart I am! I suppose there is a reason why a lot of pros preach the mantra “never ever show your hand”, makes sense. Some players claim they can try to control the other’s emotions and thoughts by showing their hand – and hey, all the power to you if you are good enough to do that. For me, I just don’t think I have that kind of control over myself, let alone another punter at the felt.

Which brings me to one last thing about egos at the table. This was also off the WPT DVD I was watching (which is over a year old, I know, but screw it it’s new to me.). I see this happen all the time in both live and online play: One player calls an all-in and then finds out they are dominated and says “Yeah, that’s what I put you on”. Wow, how smart are you buddy? You knew you were a 7-2 dog and you still called for all your chips. Who are you trying to impress?

Man, stupid people shit me.

Finally, I have added a new link on the side for “Poker Chip Tricks” for two reasons. One, it fricken awesome! Two, I am the world’s worst chip tricker and I want to learn. I can’t even shuffle the chips and I am getting nowhere fast trying to teach myself. I will report back here to see how helpful they are in getting me, the world’s worst chip tricker, into a some-what reasonable shape to dazzle the punters in the live games.


DuggleBogey said...

The reason I got my first set of chips from PSO was so I could practice chip tricks to "dazzle the punters."

I couldn't wait though and took home 20 $.50 chips from a casino in Kansas City instead. (Now I have something like 1500 chips....overkill)

I'm not sure how +EV it is doing chip tricks at the table. I do them endlessly, until my fingers cramp. The punters seem impressed, so much so that I have a difficult time getting paid off occasionally.

Sometimes it pays to impersonate a fish. Next time I'm going to bet wrong, just keep my chips in a big pile in front of me, and maybe drool a lot. I'll let you know how it turns out.

MtDewVirus said...

Thanks for the pimpage!

Uwannabet? said...

wait, wait, wait, can you have 2 titles? WGPBE & WWPCTP (world's worst poker chip trick performer) Is it possible for one person to hold both? ;)

Heafy said...

I am a man of many non-talents.